1. Having trouble logging in by clicking the link at the top right of the page? Click here to be taken to the log in page.
    Dismiss Notice

Resignation Letter

Discussion in 'TalkCeltic Pub' started by zmcfc, Jun 27, 2008.

Discuss Resignation Letter in the TalkCeltic Pub area at TalkCeltic.net.

  1. zmcfc

    Joined:
    Dec 9, 2006
    Messages:
    9,211
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Glasgow
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Larsson
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Fields of Athenrye, Celtic Symphony, LTPS
    This is a real resignation letter a Network Administrator handed in in America a few months ago

    -----
    Dear Mr. Baker,

    As an employee of an institution of higher education, I have few very basic expectations. Chief among these is that my direct superiors have an intellect that ranges above the common ground squirrel. After your consistent and annoying harassment of my co-workers and me during our commission of duties, I can only surmise that you are one of the few true genetic wastes of our time.

    Asking me, a network administrator, to explain every nuance of everything I do each time you happen to stroll into my office is not only a waste of time, but also a waste of precious oxygen. I was hired because I know how to network computer systems, and you were apparently hired to provide amusement to your employees, who watch you vainly attempt to understand the concept of "cut and paste" as it is explained to you for the hundredth time.

    You will never understand computers. Something as incredibly simple as binary still gives you too many options. You will also never understand why people hate you, but I am going to try and explain it to you, even though I am sure this will be just as effective as telling you what an IP is. Your shiny new iMac has more personality than you ever will.

    You wander around the building all day, shiftlessly seeking fault in others. You have a sharp dressed, useless look about you that may have worked for your interview, but now that you actually have responsibility, you * it off on overworked staff, hoping their talent will cover for your glaring ineptitude. In a world of managerial evolution, you are the blue-green algae that everyone else eats and laughs at. Managers like you are a sad proof of the Dilbert principle.

    Seeing as this situation is unlikely to change without you getting a full frontal lobotomy reversal, I am forced to tender my resignation; however, I have a few parting thoughts:

    1. When someone calls you in reference to employment, it is illegal for you to give me a bad recommendation as I have consistently performed my duties and even more. The most you can say to hurt me is, "I prefer not to comment." To keep you honest, I will have friends randomly call you over the next couple of years, because I know you would be unable to do it on your own.

    2. I have all the passwords to every account on the system and I know every password you have used for the last five years. If you decide to get cute, I will publish your "Favorites," which I conveniently saved when you made me "back up" your useless files. I do believe that terms like "Lolita" are not viewed favorably by the university administrations.

    3. When you borrowed the digital camera to "take pictures of your mother's b-day," you neglected to mention that you were going to take nude pictures of yourself in the mirror. Then, like the techno-moron you are, you forgot to erase them. Suffice it to say, I have never seen such odd acts with a ketchup bottle. I assure you that those photos are being kept in safe places pending your authoring of a glowing letter of recommendation. (And, for once, would you please try to use spellcheck? I hate correcting your mistakes.)

    I expect the letter of recommendation on my desk by 8:00 am tomorrow. One word of this to anybody and all of your twisted little repugnant obsessions will become public knowledge. Never f*ck with your systems administrator, Mr. Baker! They know what you do with all that free time!

    Sincerely

    David Blocker

    Network Administrator

    :56:
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 27, 2008
  2. Rendog

    Joined:
    Jul 27, 2006
    Messages:
    14,080
    Likes Received:
    2,580
    Location:
    Philadelphia museum of art
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Kieran Tierney
    Fav Celtic Song:
    The SAM song
    * brillaint we were talking about resigning last night as well in one of my * threads!
     
  3. qatar bhoy

    Joined:
    May 15, 2008
    Messages:
    500
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    doha, qatar
    Fav Celtic Player:
    boruc
    Fav Celtic Song:
    the celtic song / boys of the old brigade
    never did get my ketchup bottle pics back :52::52::52:
     
  4. Jungle Bhoy

    Joined:
    Jun 15, 2005
    Messages:
    12,543
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    Sharm el Sheikh, Egypt
    :56::56:

    Brilliant!
     
  5. Paddy1957

    Joined:
    Jan 4, 2008
    Messages:
    408
    Likes Received:
    5
    Location:
    Broseley
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Roy Keane
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Fields of Athenry
    Would you like to buy them?
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 27, 2008
  6. qatar bhoy

    Joined:
    May 15, 2008
    Messages:
    500
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    doha, qatar
    Fav Celtic Player:
    boruc
    Fav Celtic Song:
    the celtic song / boys of the old brigade
    * i knew this would come back to haunt me someday :52::52::52:
     
  7. ricroc7777

    Joined:
    Mar 7, 2008
    Messages:
    415
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    LONDON
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Shaun Maloney
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Fields Of Athenry/L.T.P.S.
    HP or HEINZ?
     
  8. zmcfc

    Joined:
    Dec 9, 2006
    Messages:
    9,211
    Likes Received:
    2
    Location:
    Glasgow
    Fav Celtic Player:
    Larsson
    Fav Celtic Song:
    Fields of Athenrye, Celtic Symphony, LTPS

    That is the question... :50:
     
  9. qatar bhoy

    Joined:
    May 15, 2008
    Messages:
    500
    Likes Received:
    0
    Location:
    doha, qatar
    Fav Celtic Player:
    boruc
    Fav Celtic Song:
    the celtic song / boys of the old brigade
    i always found heinz the perfect fit mmmmm :52::52::52: