Trivial things that make you happy.

cup of tea with chocolate or biscuits.

 

Managed to get 1st class return train tickets Newcastle to Glasgow for my gig using my virgin Atlantic points. Saved £110

 

They were * but they cost less to build and also due to only having 3 wheels the driver paid less road tax. So it was essentially the ultimate budget van.

 

When a block of cheese jumps on beans screaming

 

Having a smiling Hatate back in the team

 

Messi and Ronaldo being caught in bed sucking each other off!!

 

A fine Bridie

 

Watching Naked Attraction and realising that your * and balls are much nicer looking than the misshapen horrors being slowly revealed. What's with the head poking half out? Either you've a foreskin or you haven't. If I was the female picker on some of those episodes, I'd be turning to Anna Richardson saying '* it, I'm coming over to your side...'.

 

Giving the deliveroo guy £1 for delivery my greek sausages and potatoes to me. Basically altruism..

 

The person/takeaway you ordered your Greek sausages and potatoes from will be * aff with the Deliveroo delivery guy also considering it costs them fees. Reasons why many takeaways are still old school & use there own delivery drivers.

 

edit - picked your post up wrong

 

yea i heard about that from my local chippy guy, he wants nothing to do with them because they charge both ways. Its a good way for businesses to stand out though. Lots of folks can discover new options apart from their usual food. I like to give some sort of tip but am also considering the 50% chance of my coke getting stolen regardless

 

Yeah a load take nothing to do with them aswell as similar other couriers that do the same thing it mainly sprung up around the Covid period if memory serves me correctly hence the reason a load of business that didn’t previously deliver began. Whatever happened tae ringing your local and tipping boss man

 

Took my son to Sooty Live today, watching him absolutely * himself laughing at the same jokes I did as a kid was brilliant.

 

Do you know how * wants me to be the best emcee? Because I keep rhyming stuff by accident when I'm writing stuff. Maybe not in this case but generally speaking its true.
Question is, do I harness this? Shall I begin my lyrical quest? See what happens...

 

The smell of a newly unwrapped bar of Palmolive soap.

Finally catching that * spider who's been taking the * from under the skirting board these past few days.

 

You can't make things rhyme,
Like all the * time,
This is Scotland, smoke yer blaw and drink yer wine,
Everything will be fine,
Go oot, steal a motor, do a crime,
Get yer bank card, cut a line,
Go bowling for columbine,
Like all the muthafuckin time,
Put on Patsy Cline, Eat a tin of tuna n brine,
And be in yer bed for the back of 9,
Or sit on your sofa and recline
Or go and get a job done a mine,


That's about it..

 

quite sick…

 

you lot are some sicko's and I'll smoke some blaw whatever that is
I'll come round yours and share your tatties, go bed early care for haggis midnight munchies. Mum gets frumpy when she sees the dishes. Raided your cupboard for tayto's but you found the packets now i'm in trouble, thats the way it goes you caught me lacking, napkin in hand lyrical assasin

 

Hearing a sudden rainstorm shut up those annoying birds that start chirping at 5:30 in the morning